Who am I?
Who do I want to be?
Who am I becoming?
What have I become?
What is changing me?
What can help me change?
What is wrong with me?
What can I blame all of these thought and ideas and feelings on?
I have only two answers for all of these questions.
"I don't know."
and
"Nothing but myself."
Neither are satisfying.
You are what you is, Jayden. Plenty of things to like about that. Maybe you're focusing on the wrong aspects.
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